Exploring the sex party scene

In my last blog post I wrote about how I was beginning to experience ‘sex party fatigue’. The experiences hadn’t been what I’d hoped they would be. I couldn’t decide if it was because of the parties themselves or my mismatched expectations. The more I went, the more I realised that it also had a lot to do with the person I went with. I hadn’t really thought about that when I first started going. I’d only really considered what I’d want from them. So I began to wonder if the sex party scene really was for me after all.

I’d reached a point where I’d sworn off them, that was until I started talking to a friend who’d been on the sex party scene for a while. They suggested that rather than leaving completely, try a different organiser. He told me about a club he was a member of that did parties in London and recommended I give them a try. However, it was a good few months before I actually agreed to go.

eye wide

The infamous sex party scene from ‘Eyes Wide Shut’

There were a number of reasons that I changed my mind and decided to try this sex club. First of, he told me there was a dancefloor with a DJ and bring your own booze. I felt reassured that if I didn’t want to have sex, I could still drink, dance and socialise. He also told me the club had a dungeon. This felt like a space where I could explore my kinks where again the focus was less on sex.

So, a few weeks ago I gave in and went along with this friend. I entered the club through a discreet, unassuming door into a reception area where I registered and they explained a little about what happens. The reception then leads into the main room of the club. On both sides of the room there are seating areas where you can sit and socialise. At the far end there’s a DJ with a strippers pole in the centre of the dancefloor. To the right are the fridges and bar area where you can bring your own alcohol, make drinks and store your booze. There’s also a locker and changing area to get into your fancy lingerie.

The club sits across three floors and I decided to explore the top floor first. From memory this mainly consisted of ‘the orgy room’, an entire room sectioned off with curtains and large beds to play. On the night I was there, there didn’t seem to be much play taking place and quite a few people sitting and watching. I’m sure this would have been a fun room to join in with, if there were less spectators.

I then headed downstairs which to the basement where far more people seemed to be congregating. Whilst exploring I found a small room off a kitchen area that was kitted out like a study with an oak table and chair. I loved the idea of all the role plays that have gone on in that room.

Next there was an open area at the bottom of the staircase with beds and seating. At the end of  a corridor there were a number of private rooms, with raised beds and lockable doors. I really liked this idea because whilst for some people, they enjoy being watched or watching, for others that’s not their thing and this offers a bit of privacy or if nothing else, a gentle introduction to ease you in.

Further along the corridor there were rooms with a glory hole, which I discovered when a hand popped out at me and made me jump. There was also a dark room which I assume was for sensory deprivation play.

Then came my favourite room, the dungeon which included a jail/cell with bars and a sex swing. The room was kitted out with all kinds of kinky apparatus including what looked like gymnastics equipment and a St Andrew’s Cross. This seemed to be the main source of play in the room. My friend and I watched as a beautiful young woman was being tied to the cross and played with by her partner and the Master of the Boudoir. Quite a large crowd gathered and it was very sexy to watch.

By this point I was starting to feel unwell, I presume from a burger I ate at dinner because as soon as we left the dungeon I started throwing up. Not the most sexy thing to see at a sex club. So that was my signal to call it a night and head back to my hotel, to stick my head in a toilet.

Looking back I feel that despite it seemingly being another disaster at a sex club with me getting ill and throwing up, I would actually go back again. The Saturday seemed very quite and there didn’t seem to be a lot of play going on that night. My friend did say it was unusually quiet so perhaps it was just a one off, although if I go again I’d be tempted to try a Friday night.

What I also liked about this sex club was that the onus wasn’t entirely on having sex. For someone like me who is still finding their feet in this scene, it was something of a relief. It means the option is there if you want to, but your whole night doesn’t revolve around it.

I’m glad I went along and whilst it didn’t turn out the way I was expecting (I won’t eat burgers before attending a sex club again), it hasn’t scared me off either. So whilst I don’t have any plans to attend a sex club again in the coming weeks and months, now that I have a years membership, the door is still open if I do change my mind and want to explore again.

Have you been to a sex club or party recently? If so feel free to share your experiences below.